Mental And Spiritual Raging War & 30 x 5

Hey guys, it been a pretty busy couple of days for me, both mentally and physically, so first let me go ahead and get my 30 x 5 update out of the way! It was a rough start, the first day was dreary and raining, but I think I did a pretty good job of improvising! I briskly walked through many errands and two different grocery store trips, one being wow-mart. Of course the wow-mart experience was to get something I forgot from the other store. The funny thing was, what I needed was at the very back of the store, so I parked as far as way from the door that was safe enough and powered walked the entire way. Joey was worn out and kept asking me why I was walking so fast and I told him it was a new form of exercise!! It worked, not to sure about it being an entire 30 minute work-out, but it was better than nothing!!

Yesterday was not good for me either! We are doing photo's for a new church directory, and the bad part is we stated taking pictures on a Wednesday (bad, bad). I got to work at 8:00 am and I left work last night at 9:45 pm, so again, no time to really exercise. But on a good side note, I am making healthy choices on the food end, so I feel that is a great accomplishment!!

Okay, for the not so good part, the raging war. I am really struggling mentally and spiritually right now. I know our God is so powerful that he could nip this thing right in the bud with satan, but my human me, is fighting for strength to keep my head above water right now. There is a battle, and my thoughts are not where they have been for the past couple of months and I CANNOT go back to where I was. It was so bad this morning that I woke my Hubby up before I left for work and had to tell him, "please let me tell you something I am thinking, and it's so unchristian of me to be thinking this, but I need to tell someone that will understand". Of course what I sad was so not kind, so I will spare you the details of my conversation with Hubby. The bad thing is I do not want these thoughts to drag me back to my depths of despair, and I refuse to let them! Please be in prayer for me and my terrible family situation. Above all please be in prayer for my Hubby and kids, especially my teenagers. This has been so incredibly hard on them and I worry so much for them. Thanks!!